7 subtle signs a man has grown up and matured, according to psychology

Did you know that men reach maturity at the age of 43? That’s 11 years later than women who hit peak maturity at 32.

Some women even believe that men never fully grow up. 

It’s no wonder many women desperately search for signs that a man has matured when choosing a partner. But how can you tell?

The good news is you don’t have to figure it out alone.

Turns out: there are some subtle signs you can look out for that tell you a man has grown up and matured, according to the experts in psychology. 

Today, we’re sharing 7 of those signs, to help you to know if a guy is mature or not. 

Ready? Let’s get started. 

1) He has good emotional control 

Have you ever met a guy who seems to fly off the handle at the slightest inconvenience? 

Maybe he snaps at minor frustrations or gets overwhelmingly upset over small issues.

It’s like he’s on an emotional rollercoaster that’s hard to watch and even harder to be around.

Here’s the thing: managing emotions is a skill, and it gets better with practice.

Studies show that older adults often handle their emotions better, not just because of their age, but because they’ve matured and developed strategies to manage how they react to things over time.

Pay attention to how he reacts in high-stress situations. Can he stay calm, or do his emotions get the better of him?

Most people aren’t born with great emotional regulation, so if he’s able to stay composed under emotional stress it’s a big sign he’s pretty mature.

2) He takes responsibility for his actions

When a man moves from dodging blame to standing by his actions regardless of the consequences, it’s a clear sign he’s grown and matured.

It’s much easier to blame someone else or avoid dealing with problems when mistakes happen. 

However, a truly mature man knows better. He realizes that how he reacts to situations, good or bad, is up to him.

According to psychotherapist Tonya Lester, “Emotionally mature people take full responsibility for their feelings, their reactions, and their lives.”

If he’s late to an important event, instead of blaming traffic or the alarm clock, he’ll admit he should have planned better. 

He understands that owning up to this can prevent the same mistake in the future.

Similarly, when he succeeds, he doesn’t just soak up the praise. 

He acknowledges the help he received along the way, showing appreciation for others’ contributions.

This balance of acknowledging both wins and losses and learning from each experience is what marks his growth into a mature individual. 

By handling life this way, he shows he’s not just grown older but wiser and more mature.

3) He’s resilient in the face of big challenges

Life is full of curveballs and unexpected twists and turns, right? How a man deals with these challenges tells you a lot about his maturity.

A mature man isn’t easily knocked down by tough times. 

Instead, he shows resilience, understanding that setbacks are just part of life and can actually help him grow. 

Research shows that there’s a strong link between this level of resilience and emotional maturity, helping him to bounce back faster. 

He’s got a growth mindset so instead of taking failures to heart, he learns from them and adjusts his approach.

His knack for taking life’s punches and coming back stronger is a big sign of true maturity, turning challenges into stepping stones for personal growth.

4) He’s not afraid to be vulnerable 

Have you ever met a guy who’s totally okay with showing his soft side?

He doesn’t shy away from sharing his feelings, admitting mistakes, or asking for help when he needs it.

Being this open isn’t easy: it shows real courage and confidence.

Dr. Brené Brown explains the power of vulnerability well: “Vulnerability is the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, courage, empathy, and creativity. It is the source of hope, empathy, accountability, and authenticity.”

It’s hard because it means letting his guard down and risking getting hurt.

But, embracing vulnerability is crucial for personal growth.

Research points out that it’s a key part of developing as a person.

Seeing vulnerability as a strength is about being true to himself and others, without hiding. That’s what maturity looks like.

5) He shows empathy towards others

Empathy means understanding and sharing other people’s feelings, and it’s a big sign that someone has matured. 

When guys are younger, they might not think too much about how others feel because they’re busy with their own lives. 

But as they grow up, they start to see things differently and care more about others.

American psychologist and author Marshall B. Rosenberg explains it simply, “Empathy is a respectful understanding of what others are feeling.”

When my brother first moved abroad, he was so wrapped up in his own world that he would rush through phone calls with our mom, barely engaging. 

At first, he didn’t understand how much his moving away had affected her. However, over time, as he matured, he started to understand her perspective. 

He realized how important these calls were to her and began to invest more time and attention into their conversations.

This change in behavior shows his growth in empathy. 

When a guy can show empathy to others like this, it’s a true sign of maturity.

7) He’s open-minded and adaptable

Have you ever met someone who really listens to different viewpoints?

Being open-minded is a major sign of emotional maturity

A mature man doesn’t just stick to what he knows; he’s curious about other perspectives and new ideas. 

This openness broadens his understanding of the world and brings rich experiences into his life.

He’s also flexible in his actions, ready to adjust his approach in response to life’s challenges. 

Whether it’s in a heated discussion or a sudden change of plans, he’s willing to find a middle ground and adapt as needed.

Lisa Lawless, Ph.D., clinical psychologist., sums it up nicely: “A person who has developed a strong emotional maturity is flexible and open-minded by being adaptable to change.”

This adaptability isn’t just practical; it shows he’s committed to growing and learning from every new experience and interaction. 

That’s a real mark of maturity.

8) He’s not easily swayed by his friends

When guys are young and immature, they often base their actions on what their buddies think is cool. 

Their choices and behaviors are heavily influenced by their social circle.

As they mature and gain independence, they’re less likely to let those opinions sway major decisions or impact their lives significantly.

Psychologists describe this phase as working on self-differentiation, developing a personal identity and viewpoints that are distinct from those around him.

If you notice that a man makes his own choices and follows his own path without being overly influenced by others, it’s a subtle sign he’s matured and grown up.

He still values his friends and considers their opinions, but he’s learned to balance maintaining those relationships with keeping his independence. 

This balance is a true sign of maturity.

Final thoughts 

Growing up and maturing means a lot more than just getting older. 

It’s about learning to handle your emotions, make your own decisions, and really understand others. 

The signs of maturity we’ve talked about show that a man is not just older, but wiser and more thoughtful too.

So, if you notice these qualities in a guy you know, you can be pretty confident that they’re well on their way to becoming a truly mature individual

Picture of Cat Harper

Cat Harper

Cat is an experienced Sales and Enablement professional turned writer whose passions span from psychology and relationships to continuous self-improvement, lifelong learning and pushing back on societal expectations to forge a life she loves. An avid traveler and adventure sports enthusiast, in her downtime you'll find Cat snowboarding, motorcycling or working on her latest self-development project.

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