6 signs a man loves you from the bottom of his heart, according to psychology

A guy might tell you how special you are to him or how happy he feels when he’s with you. But can his words be trusted?

After all, we all know that talk is cheap and proof is the bottom line for everyone. 

You: If only there was a way to figure out if my man truly loves me once and for all!

Psychology: <slips quietly through the door> Uh, yeah, actually, there kind of already are, like, a lot.

Or at least there are signs that you can look for. These can be behavioral signs in the things he does, hints in his mood, and, yes, clues from the things he says as well.

Taken independently, none of them will give you the whole picture. But when you start to notice one clue after another, the answer will be clear.

So here are six signs a man loves you from the bottom of his heart, according to psychology, that you can look for to find out the truth right now!

1) He’s happy

Right, so you might not need a PhD to figure this one out. At least, we probably wouldn’t expect a man to be totally in love with you when he’s miserable around you.

According to psychology, love and happiness really do go hand-in-hand and that should surprise nobody.

But at least the science is able to give us an explanation of why and how this works.

We should first think about the first and most basic form of love that most mammals experience which is mother and child bonding that largely happens during breastfeeding. 

Researchers have found that this act releases lots of oxytocin and vasopressin in the mother. These hormones do a whole lot, like causing mammary cells to contract to stimulate milk release, as well as increasing positive social contact and bonding, improving memory and attention, reducing anxiety, and promoting relaxation and well-being.

That’s great for babies drinking mothers’ milk, but how is this related to romance?

According to this article on the neurobiology of love, “…most regions charted to contain vasopressin and oxytocin receptors in the human brain are activated by both maternal and romantic love”.

In other words, all those positive hormonal changes also show up as happiness when a man is really in love with you.

So you’ll see that he’s happier, more social, more relaxed, and generally feeling great. Being in love with you makes him feel good on a biochemical level that’s impossible to hide!

2) He’s compassionate toward you

A dictionary definition of compassion might say something like feeling sympathy and concern for others. But in a personal sense, you can tell if your man is compassionate toward you in some practical ways.

Does he ask about your feelings and support you when you’re down?

Does he commiserate with you when you need him to and try not to burden you when you’re already struggling with lots of stress?

It turns out that compassion is a hugely important factor in true, lasting love in romantic relationships. 

According to research, compassion in a relationship increases the social support partners give each other as well as the partners’ responsiveness, caregiving, and willingness to sacrifice for the other.

This same research also found that couples who reported a lot of compassion in their relationships felt closer and more satisfied than couples who didn’t.

So if the more signs of compassion for you that your man shows, the more likely it is that he really cares for you and that your relationship should have long-term success. 

That’s great news, isn’t it?

3) He’ll be close and direct

A lot of people have their own theories about body language that can tell you what’s going on inside a person’s head and heart. While some may be right, most are untested and simply speculative.

That’s where psychological research comes into play.

Studies have been done comparing how people act when they like someone and how people think others might act when they like them.

It turns out that things like eye contact and smiling are not nearly as predictive as most of us think. These behaviors help people gain trust and build rapport, but they don’t necessarily have anything to do with attraction or romantic interest.

At the same time, this big study looked at how people behave when they’re attracted and romantically interested and found some real clues. Their biggest indicators were getting physically close to the person and talking to them a lot or engaging them directly.

In other words, when someone’s really into you, they’ll try to get and stay close to you and also interact with you, trying to keep your attention. Interestingly, these were two factors also reported by cultures around the world as signs of attraction, so it’s confirmed by science and society!

4) He doesn’t pay attention

Wait a second, didn’t we just say that if a man is really into you, he wants to get close and keep you engaged?

Absolutely!

But the authors of this study, called Inattentive and Contented, used this little word trick, and I thought I would, too.

After all, they don’t say what it is that the man isn’t paying attention to.

What they studied was, in fact, how much men paid attention to images of other attractive alternatives to their partners.

What they found was that men who said they were happier in their relationships spent less time looking at images of other attractive women (the study only looked at cis-hetero relationships). They still looked – they were actually instructed to do so – but they spent way less time, on average, examining the images.

What does that tell us?

If your man is really into you, loves you, and is content in your relationship, his head doesn’t turn.

Hey, he’s not dead – his eyes can’t help but see sexually attractive signs, but he doesn’t get distracted by them or pay them too much mind. In short, he doesn’t pay attention to others, just you!

5) He enjoys your company

Strangely enough, some couples actually like spending time together.

Weird statement, I know. I also know that it sounds sarcastic but it’s not. The truth is that many couples spend lots of time together just to be together, through feelings of obligation, love, attachment, and interdependence.

But they often don’t particularly enjoy their time spent together as much as they might with other people like their best friends.

That should be the weird statement, and yet it’s really quite common. 

Think of women who like to spend time with “their girls” whenever they can or men who always seem to be off with “the guys.”

The relationship may still work, but the partner is not always the person’s first pick to hang out with.

However, when people truly like each other, they do enjoy each other’s company and look forward to it. 

This study states that “We consider liking between people to occur when they enjoy each other’s company and generally find pleasure interacting together.” The study also found that couples who like each other more have better chances of relationship success than couples who don’t.

So, while liking may be different from loving your partner, it’s still a great sign that your man is way into you and really appreciates who you are. So it’s really an important aspect of love after all.

6) He celebrates your successes

You know that part of traditional wedding vows where they say “for better or for worse”?

Most of us think that the challenge there is to continue loving and supporting our partner during the worst – when times are hard.

However, studies have actually found that how couples interact and treat each other during the best times also makes a hugely important difference.

See, when someone is hurting or is unhappy, it’s pretty obvious that they’d like support from their partner. But how their partner reacts and interacts with them when things are going splendidly can be just as important.

Some couples are highly competitive or even jealous of each other. When one partner has a big achievement, the other might act disinterested or even try to downplay things to take the wind out of their partner’s sails.

Other couples may not really pay attention or care much.

But what the research shows is that relationships between people who listen to their partners’ success stories, celebrate them, and congratulate them have much higher satisfaction and long-term success.

So if a man loves you from the bottom of his heart, he won’t just help you when you’re down, but he’ll cheer the loudest for you when you’re up.

Conclusion

These six signs a man loves you from the bottom of his heart, according to psychology, can finally help you figure out the truth.

While his words might not tell you the whole story, look at your guy’s actions, and they’ll let you know how he truly feels, even if he’s not entirely clear on that himself.