Confidence – it’s that elusive quality we all aspire to possess. But how do you truly spot it in someone else? Body language is a powerful, yet often overlooked, tool in decoding the secrets of self-assuredness.
After years of observing leaders, influencers, and individuals who radiate self-belief, I’ve compiled a list of 14 little-known body language signs that subtly hint at the true confidence of a person.
If these signs align with someone you know – or even better, with yourself – you might just be in the presence of an authentically confident individual.
Let’s dive in.
1) Their posture speaks volumes
A slouched posture can often be a telltale sign of lack of confidence, while a person who stands tall exudes an air of assurance.
Individuals who are truly confident make it a point to maintain a good posture. This doesn’t mean puffing out their chest or pulling back their shoulders excessively – that’s overcompensation.
Instead, it’s about standing or sitting upright in a natural and relaxed manner, aligning their head, neck, and shoulders in a confident line.
The way you carry yourself physically speaks volumes about your self-esteem and confidence even before you utter a single word.
2) They maintain steady eye contact
My first job interview was a disaster. I was nervous, fumbling over my words, and worst of all, I could barely meet the interviewer’s gaze.
Fast forward to now and I’ve realized that maintaining eye contact is indeed a powerful display of confidence.
It shows you’re not afraid to engage with others and that you’re focused on the conversation at hand.
But remember, there’s a fine line between making eye contact and staring – you don’t want to make the other person uncomfortable! It’s all about balance.
Over the years, I’ve learned to master this balance and trust me, it does wonders for your perceived confidence levels.
3) They are comfortable with silence
In the midst of a conversation, people who are truly confident don’t feel the need to fill every silence with words.
While some might see silence as an awkward pause, they see it as a natural part of communication.
Silence gives you time to process your thoughts and formulate well-articulated responses.
It also shows that you are comfortable in your own skin and don’t feel pressured to keep up a constant stream of chatter to prove your worth or assert your presence.
4) They use open body language
Next on the list of body language signs that define true confidence is the way I position my body during interactions, reflecting my level of confidence.
Instead of crossing my arms or legs, which can come off as defensive or closed off, I try to keep my body language open.
This involves facing the person I’m talking to directly and keeping my arms at my sides or comfortably resting in my lap.
Open body language sends a clear message that I’m approachable, receptive, and confident in my interaction.
5) They don’t fidget
Fidgeting can often be a sign of nervousness or discomfort.
Confident people know how to keep their movements purposeful and controlled.
They avoid unnecessary fidgeting, like tapping their foot or constantly adjusting their clothing, as it can distract the other person and detract from what they are saying.
By keeping these nervous habits in check, you’ll be able to present yourself as calm, composed, and sure of yourself.
When observing others, take note of their gestures and movements. Those who are able to keep their fidgeting to a minimum are likely exuding genuine confidence.
6) They smile genuinely
A smile can be a powerful tool in communication.
When you smile, it’s not just a polite, forced curve of the lips but a genuine reflection of your positive state of mind.
A true smile extends beyond the mouth to the eyes, creating what’s often referred to as ‘crow’s feet’. This kind of smile, known as a Duchenne smile, is indicative of genuine happiness and confidence.
7) They walk with purpose
The way a person walks can reveal a lot about their confidence levels.
When they walk, they do so with purpose and determination. Their steps are firm and steady, mirroring the confidence they carry within them.
The next time you see someone walking, observe their stride—it could reveal more about their self-assuredness than you think.
8) They show empathy through their body language
Showing empathy is not just about understanding and sharing someone else’s feelings. It’s also about expressing that understanding through your body language.
When I observe truly confident individuals in a conversation, they use body language to demonstrate genuine interest and empathy.
This can be through mirroring the other person’s body language, nodding in agreement, or leaning in slightly to show they are actively listening. These actions send a clear message that you not only hear what the other person is saying but also genuinely care.
A truly confident person doesn’t just speak; they listen, understand, and respond empathetically – all conveyed through their body language.
9) They’re not afraid to take up space
In a world that often tells us to shrink ourselves, to not take up too much room, standing your ground can be a powerful sign of confidence.
When sitting or standing, do you try not to make yourself smaller?
Do you naturally spread out, not in a way that encroaches on others’ space, but in a manner that says you are comfortable with who you are and have every right to be here?
If yes, those are clear signs that you are a truly confident person.
It’s not about being dominant or aggressive. It’s about acknowledging your own worth and the space you occupy.
10) They touch their face less
Touching the face is often a subconscious action that we do when we’re nervous or uncomfortable.
As a confident person myself, I have noticed that I tend to touch my face less during conversations.
This is because I am comfortable in my own skin and do not feel the need to hide or shield myself.
By keeping my hands away from my face, I am able to maintain better eye contact and appear more open and approachable.
11) They use their hands when they talk
When I converse, I often use my hands to articulate my points.
This gesture does more than just emphasize my words—it expresses my confidence in what I’m saying. It shows that I am engaged and passionate about the topic at hand.
Be aware of how people use their hands while talking, as it can be an effective indicator of their confidence levels.
12) They maintain a calm demeanor
Even in stressful situations, individuals who believe in themselves strive to keep a calm and composed demeanor.
This doesn’t mean they are hiding their emotions, but rather managing them in a way that reflects their inner strength and confidence.
Observe how people react under pressure – those who can maintain their composure often exude genuine confidence.
13) They have a firm handshake
A handshake may seem trivial, but it can speak volumes about a person’s confidence levels, and people are two times more likely to remember you if you shake hands with them.
The handshake, often our first form of communication when meeting someone new, can set the tone for the interaction.
A confident person extends a firm, but not crushing, handshake.
It’s a nonverbal way of saying, “I’m confident, reliable and open.”
14) They’re not afraid to be themselves
It’s often said that the most confident people are also the most authentic.
Their self-assuredness allows them to be true to themselves and others, without feeling the need to put on a mask or fit into a mold.
Authentic individuals interact with others in a genuine and heartfelt manner.
They aren’t preoccupied with trying to impress or win approval. Instead, they communicate honestly and openly, showing respect for both themselves and those they interact with.
Last word
As we navigate through this journey of understanding body language and recognizing confidence, it’s essential that we also turn the lens inward.
Because discovering true confidence doesn’t just lie in observing others, but also in embracing ourselves – our strengths, our weaknesses, our quirks, and our passions.
Understanding and accepting ourselves is the cornerstone to building authentic confidence.
It’s about acknowledging that we are unique individuals with our own set of talents and abilities.
It’s about not comparing ourselves to others or trying to fit into a particular mold.
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