I was at a friend’s dinner party not too long ago, and the conversation shifted to childhood privileges.Someone joked that they never knew how to do laundry until college.
Another admitted they still ask their parents for gas money.
It was all in good humor, but I noticed how certain habits seemed to stem from being “spoiled” growing up—habits that stuck well into adulthood.
Today, I want to share nine such behaviors that, according to psychology, indicate someone might have been raised with an overabundance of indulgence.
This isn’t about shaming or labeling.
It’s about recognizing these traits and (if they resonate) challenging ourselves to move beyond them.
1. Entitlement runs deep
Entitlement shows up when a person believes they deserve special treatment or exceptions to the rules.
I’ve encountered people who assume they can jump ahead in lines or expect others to bend policies just for them.
They’re the ones who might say something like, “There must be a way to make an exception, right?”
The sense of “I’m special, so the rules don’t apply” is classic.
According to Psychology Today, chronic entitlement can actually hinder healthy relationships, because it creates an imbalanced dynamic where one person is always taking.
The big question is: does someone demand perks without considering how it affects others?
If yes, that’s a red flag of a spoiled upbringing.
2. Lack of empathy
When someone rarely stops to consider how others feel, it can suggest they never had to.
They might interrupt people mid-sentence or ignore another’s discomfort in a tense situation.
I’ve seen this in group projects.
One individual would refuse to accommodate anyone’s schedule but their own, and it was clear they didn’t see why that was an issue.
Over time, a consistent lack of empathy can point to a childhood where emotional needs were always met by someone else, leaving little room to learn compassion.
As researcher Brené Brown once noted, “Empathy has no script. There is no right way or wrong way to do it. It’s simply listening, holding space, withholding judgment, and emotionally connecting.”
When that skill is missing, it’s a strong indicator of a spoiled background.
3. Instant gratification is the norm
Ever met someone who struggles to wait for, well, anything?
They want it now, and if they don’t get it, frustration takes over.
This need for instant gratification often traces back to a childhood where every wish was quickly fulfilled.
You might have read my post on mindful relationships, where I touched on how patience can be cultivated through small daily habits.
Practices like yoga and meditation teach us to slow down and tune in to the present moment.
If someone never learned to wait, you might see them jump from project to project or expect major life changes to happen overnight.
According to studies on self-regulation, the ability to delay gratification is a critical life skill linked to emotional well-being.
People who grew up spoiled may not have had enough opportunities to practice that patience.
4. Difficulty handling rejection
Growing up, many of us experience the occasional “no” from parents or authority figures.
That’s part of life.
But individuals who were never told “no” often reach adulthood with zero tools for coping with rejection.
This might manifest as extreme sulking, lashing out, or shutting down completely when they face refusal or criticism.
I’ve seen someone quit a job on the spot after the boss gave them constructive feedback.
Rejection stung them so deeply they couldn’t handle staying a minute longer.
Wayne Dyer famously said, “How people treat you is their karma; how you react is yours.”
Handling rejection with resilience is a huge sign of maturity.
Struggling at every hint of “no” can be a sign that rejection is a brand-new language for them.
5. Minimal accountability
This is where I’ve noticed bullet points can help clarify:
- Blaming others for personal mistakes
- Constantly making excuses
- Struggling to say “I messed up”
- Redirecting responsibility to avoid consequences
When a person grew up extremely spoiled, they might not have learned to own their actions.
If parents or caregivers swept every mistake under the rug, accountability was never developed.
As an adult, this can lead to blaming traffic for being late or blaming the landlord for not replacing a busted light bulb—rather than acknowledging they could take initiative themselves.
Taking responsibility is an essential skill for any healthy relationship, whether it’s with a partner, coworkers, or friends.
Without it, trust erodes fast.
6. Overdependence on others
People who were overindulged in childhood can become reliant on someone else to do everything for them.
They might call their parents to troubleshoot even the simplest tasks or constantly lean on a partner to make decisions.
I remember once living with a roommate who couldn’t cook, clean, or handle her finances.
She’d always say, “Someone will figure this out for me.”
Her parents had done all her chores growing up, so now, these tasks felt alien to her.
Overdependence often robs us of the chance to learn self-sufficiency.
When someone is used to having every need met, they miss out on the confidence that comes from solving problems alone.
7. Constant need for praise
Some people fish for compliments in almost every conversation.
They post on social media hoping for an outpouring of “likes,” or they subtly boast about minor achievements to get recognition.
If compliments were tossed around like candy in childhood—always praising every small task—they might expect that same level of constant affirmation as adults.
The problem is that adult life rarely provides endless pats on the back.
I’ve worked with colleagues who seemed deflated if nobody acknowledged their efforts at every turn, which made collaboration harder.
Now, I’m not saying we shouldn’t celebrate achievements.
I love acknowledging success.
But needing nonstop praise can indicate that someone’s sense of self-worth was built entirely on external validation.
8. Poor financial boundaries
I’ve encountered individuals who never budget because they assume money will show up somehow.
They don’t mind racking up credit card debt or borrowing from friends, believing it’ll all be fine in the end.
This attitude often begins in homes where material needs were instantly satisfied without any talk about limits or trade-offs.
Some folks were never taught the value of a dollar, so spending without consideration feels normal.
They may also assume other people will cover their costs.
It can be challenging to break this mindset.
When I shifted to a more minimalist lifestyle, I became acutely aware of how every purchase impacts both my finances and my mental space.
That shift taught me the difference between wanting something and truly needing it.
9. Struggle with gratitude
Before we finish, there’s one more thing I need to address.
People who grew up spoiled often have trouble expressing genuine gratitude.
When life’s comforts have always been there, acknowledging them can feel foreign.
I’ve noticed this in simple situations, like saying “thank you” to a server at a restaurant or feeling genuine appreciation for a thoughtful gift.
If gratitude wasn’t modeled or required, it may not come naturally.
Cultivating gratitude is one reason I rely on daily mindfulness practices.
Pausing to reflect on what’s good in my life has changed how I view success, comfort, and even conflict.
I believe that when we actively notice the blessings around us, it’s easier to stay grounded and more present in our relationships.
Final thoughts
If any of these behaviors ring a bell—maybe in yourself or someone close—recognizing them is the first step toward growth.
Changing spoiled habits might feel awkward, but it’s entirely possible with self-awareness and consistent effort.
When we take responsibility for our actions, develop empathy, and practice gratitude, we become more resilient and connected.
It’s never too late to learn the lessons that might have been missed in childhood.
After all, personal growth isn’t about looking back with blame—it’s about moving forward with compassion.
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