If you relate to these 6 signs, you’re sorely lacking good friendships in your life

We live in a culture that glamorizes the beauty of romance and underestimates the value of friendship.

While your grandma or uncle may ask you about your love life at every family dinner, no one really bothers to inquire whether you’re still in touch with your best friend or if the trip abroad has finally made it out of the group chat with your friends.

And since good friendships aren’t talked about enough, it’s no wonder that so many people end up surrounded by the wrong people or by no one at all.

Here goes…

If you relate to these 6 signs, you’re sorely lacking good friendships in your life.

1) You have no one to talk to when you’re down

Let’s start with the most obvious sign of all – when everything’s going well, your friends are more than happy to hang out, but the moment things go south, you suddenly have no one to confide in at all.

It is precisely in these moments that we’re able to recognize how much our loved ones value and cherish us and whether they can make some sacrifices on their end in order to help us get through a rough patch.

Unfortunately, this is also when many people go from feeling bad to feeling even worse because they quickly come to the realization that their friendships are based on convenience rather than genuine connection.

Just like that, a massive wave of disappointment washes over you, and you feel even lonelier than before.

Been there, done that.

But you know what? It’s better to know sooner rather than later. The quicker your friends’ true characters come out, the less time you get to waste on bad friendships.

And the more time you have to find people who make for truly amazing friends.

2) You always feel misunderstood by your friends

It’s completely okay to have different kinds of friendships, each of which fulfills its own purpose.

While you may have a lot to talk about with Cath when it comes to relationships and psychology, you and Jamie really hit it off in terms of spirituality, not to mention Jacob has the same sense of humor, so every time you’re together, you just spend three hours laughing.

No one can fulfill 100% of your requirements or needs, which is why a mixture of good friends is ideal.

But it is one thing to get along on some levels better than others; it’s another thing entirely to feel severely misunderstood by one’s friends.

The first is normal. The latter is a sign you’re hanging out with the wrong crowd.

Here are a few other signs to watch out for:

• You don’t feel safe expressing your authentic self
• You put a filter over a lot of what you say
• You often find yourself laughing at things you don’t find particularly funny
• When you open up to a friend, you’re often met with such an underwhelming reaction that you end up feeling disappointed
• You feel like you’re too “intense” for your friends
• You’re sometimes referred to as the “weirdo” of the group

If you’ve ticked off most of these, you know what it means.

It may be time to find friends who can genuinely appreciate the authentic you.

3) You love to watch or read stories about friendship

One of the reasons so many people love Marvel films or TV shows like Stranger Things is that we really enjoy watching friendship group dynamics and feeling like we’re part of it all.

I mean, the only reason I patiently waited for my letter to Hogwarts was that I wanted to feel like I belonged in the same place as my favorite characters.

(Okay, maybe I also really wanted to be a witch. But that was a secondary goal.)

If you’re sorely lacking good friendships in your life, there’s a high chance you’re even more obsessed with these kinds of stories, be it films, TV shows, or books.

I’m speaking from personal experience. Growing up, I used to lose myself in fantasy books and wish that I could be one of the characters just so that I could have such amazing friends.

If you can relate…

Yep, that’s another sign ticked off our list.

4) You’re envious of people who are out and about with friends

During my first semester of university, I remember I found it quite difficult to make new friends. I felt out of place, I suffered from pretty bad social anxiety, and I struggled to come up to people and strike up random conversations with them.

As a result, I spent the first few months on my own. And if there’s one thing that really struck out to me, it was how lonely I felt in crowded places.

Restaurants, parks, bars, university cafeterias, you name it – people almost always moved in pairs or groups. You’d rarely see someone sitting in a restaurant all on their own or having a picnic with no one but a book.

Now that I have amazing friends, I don’t mind solitary activities one bit because I feel socially fulfilled.

But back then, I found it hard to enjoy myself because I felt really envious of all the people around me.

“I wish I could have a group of my own,” I remember thinking. “I wish I could belong.”

If you feel similarly, remember that you’re not alone. It’s very normal to crave a sense of community.

Humans are social beings, after all, and the modern world isn’t really suited to our needs on a social level – everything is tailored to individualism, from the fact that we don’t even know our neighbors to the loneliness that many new parents feel when they realize that no one’s coming to help them with the baby.

If you’re envious of other people’s social lives, don’t feel bad. Take it as a sign that you’ve got to put yourself out there.

5) You have no one to celebrate your accomplishments with

Remember the first sign of this article? The one that said you have no one to talk to when you’re down?

Well, this is the same scenario flipped on its head.

I once achieved a huge dream of mine, one that went on to change my life in some fundamental ways and really propelled me forward on my career journey.

Back then, the accomplishment felt amazing – but it was also tainted by the fact I had no one to celebrate it with. Most of my friends were out of town, the ones I did ask told me they were busy, and so there I was, journaling at home instead of celebrating with friends.

Don’t get me wrong, I still enjoyed myself.

But looking back on it now, I can see that I suffered from a lack of friends, which meant that every time I wanted to celebrate something, be it an accomplishment or my birthday, I often ended up… alone.

Thus our fifth sign you’re sorely lacking good friendships in your life.

6) You feel emotionally and physically unwell

Did you know that loneliness has the same impact on our health as smoking fifteen cigarettes per day?

Yep, it’s true.

It’s also kind of crazy when you think about it. We’re so inherently wired to socialize with other people that a lack of high-quality social interaction can quite literally wreak our minds and bodies.

Relationships – from our friends to family members and romantic partners – are at the very core of our well-being.

Don’t underestimate the power of good friendships.

And if there’s one thing I want you to take away from this article, it’s that there are great friends out there for everybody.

You’ve just got to keep looking.